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Friday, September 8, 2023

Jerry's worst and best Girlfriends on Seinfeld

 











  Seeing this show religiously, it seems every Seinfeld character has a boyfriend or girlfriend. Jerry has the most. But which ones were the best, and which ones...he was better off without? 









 JODI- Portrayed by Jennifer Coolidge in her first role. Her character is masseuse and would massage everyone but Jerry. He didn't mind making love with her, but he just wanted to get decent massage. She even despises George who was dating another girl. He wants everyone to like him. Even Jerry's girlfriend. Eventually, she decides its best to leave Jerry after he forces her to massage. George tries to be friends with her but...doesn't work out. Now Jennifer Coolidge has been in movies and tv shows. For some reason, she was not my favorite girlfriend of Jerry Seinfeld.











NINA- In the episode "the letter" Jerry dates an artist who is jealous of who Jerry hangs out with. She is portrayed by Catherine Keener. I don't know much about the actress, but she was in some movies like 'Being John Malkovich' and voicing the villain in 'Incredibles 2'. She plays Jerry's girlfriend who is jealous that he still sees Elaine even they have broken up. She plagiarizes a note from a movie by Neil Simon. Jerry asks for her forgiveness before finding out. Plus, her father is one of the accountants for the Yankees and Elaine wore an Oriels baseball cap. She even paints Kramer's portrait. She's ok, but one girlfriend Jerry can do without.











 PATTY- Portrayed by Full Houses' Lori Loughlin, Patty is Jerry's girlfriend who tries to get Jerry to feel emotions. They break up when Jerry gets angry at her for no reason, then falls apart in tears for losing her. What did I think of her, not that memorable. Plus, the actress that portrayed her...her life changed after a scandal after her college daughters were caught partying as Lori lied at their application. She got arrested while her daughters were banned from almost every college.











AMY- If you are a fan of 'Breaking Bad', the actress from the show portrays one of Jerry's girlfriends in the episode 'The Glasses.' When George loses his glasses, squinting his eyes, he notices Amy kissing Jerry's unseen cousin, Jeffrey. She even hates it when a room is cold. He decides to get Amy together with his cousin. However, it doesn't go that way and well...the truth is revealed about the seats when Jerry decides to explain the real reason to bring Amy up to his unseen cousin. This girlfriend is ok, but she was somewhat not one of my favorites.










  LANETTE- In the episode 'The Summer of George', Jerry meets a girl that he is taking to the Tony's. She has a 'dude' in her apartment that concerns Jerry. She ditches him as Jerry realizes that the 'dude' was more of a relationship intern that Jerry needed. So, he turns to George while Jerry feels Lanette is too much for him. Lanette is portrayed by Amanda Peet who I have seen in a few movies like 'Saving Silverman', '2012' and 'Melinda & Melinda'.











 BETH- Portrayed by 'Dharma and Greg' actress, Debra Messing, Jerry had his eyes on Beth for a long time. She went through two marriages when he finally dates her on 'Yada, Yada, Yada'. There was one downside...Beth is antisemitic after telling Jerry that she too is an anti-dentite. It didn't last. Did I like this girlfriend? Yes and No. Debra Messing is entertaining when she wants to be. I can tell playing a girl Jerry pines for only to find out her dark truth.











CHARLOTTE- A germaphobe like Jerry, Charlotte, portrayed by 'Sex and the City' actress Kristin Davis, doesn't find out till later that Jerry knocked her toothbrush in the toilet after she uses it. She decides to drop something of his in the toilet. They reconcile but it seemed short lived after she's covered in toilet water. She later dates Jerry's rival Banya. Kristin Davis is only known as her character in 'Sex and the City'. Since I don't watch that show, she's only known as the toilet toothbrush girlfriend of Jerry's. She's better than the others but not the best.


TOP FOUR GIRLFRIENDS:


4.








ALEX- Portrayed by 'O.C.' Actress Melinda Clarke, Alex is one of Jerry's better girlfriends who adores hairless animals. Jerry decides to shave his chest so he could feel better. However, it backfires when the hair gets thicker and itchier. In the episode 'The Muffin Tops' He ends up stuck on a bus with Alex during Kramer's bus ride. He exits the bus and itches outside. I guess that's when we don't see Alex anymore. To be fair, how long do Jerry's dates last. She was ok and seemed like a girlfriend that was ok.


3, 










 VALERIE- In the episode 'The Millenium', Gilmore Girl actress, Laura Grham portrays Jerry's girlfriend who places him on the speed dial of her phone. Her Stepmother soon gets involved with Jerry trying to place his name on her speed dial. This was before smart phones you know. Valerie was considered a caring girlfriend, but the relationship ends when her stepmother almost dies (or dies, sadly the actress that portrayed the stepmother is dead) ends up with food poising. Jerry's number was hidden in her stepmother's poison control number on her phone.



2.








 ELAINE MARIE BENES- I know I'm going to get angry responses for not having Elaine as number one, but she has been with Jerry the longest ever since they became friends. They did try the boyfriend/girlfriend technique, but it couldn't work for them. Except for one episode, Julia Louis-Dreyfus was Jerry's friend/girlfriend for the whole series. Love Julia Louis-Dreyfus and she's still doing great acting. 'VEEP' and a couple of movies have given her some great notice for not just being Elaine.


Who could be Elaine? Well...there is one more girlfriend that beats her by a quote. 'They're real and they're spectacular.'


1.










SIDRA- Portrayed by Teri Hatcher, Sidra was known as Jerry's girlfriend who had breasts that were either real or fake. To find out, Eliane decides to trip and fall on to her breasts when they were in the sauna. Teri Hatcher actually added the words, "They're real and they're Spectacular." She was Lois Lane in the live action Superman series and voice Coraline's mother in the 'Coraline' movie. 










  Jerry had more girlfriends like the one with 'man hands', Courtney Cox was one even one was a Virgin that was portrayed by the actress on Fraiser. There were many of them, but these are the girls that I remember the most. Even one of them walked around naked. Who was your favorite?

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