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Saturday, December 8, 2018

Horrible Christmas Movies

 That time of year again. Yes it is. The time where we see Christmas specials like:

   "A Charlie Brown Christmas Special"
   "The Santa Clause" with Tim Allen and even
   "National Lampoon Christmas Vacation"


  And then we got holiday movies that don't even deserve to be holiday movies. NOT AT ALL!!!



  They are the rejects, the spit ons, the horridness to make a Christmas movie look good, but only to make it worse!




   Here's a few.

Image result for I'll be home for christmas movie

    I'll be Home for Christmas: Not the old one, the Disney version. Where Jonathan Taylor Thomas portrays a jack ass of a kid who tries to impress his girlfriend. He doesn't even want to spend time with his family on Christmas, but his dad bribes him with a car to get home.
   After a test mishap, the jocks leave him stranded in a desert with a Santa Outfit. What follows is supposed to be hilarious, but I feel it's just not worth it. SO NO!


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          Christmas with the Kranks: Really? I've bitched on other horrid Christmas movies, and this gets me to hate Jamie Lee Curtis. This is about two people that don't want to put on decorations let alone having their whole town hate them for not "celebrating Christmas" so they can go on vacation on a cruise. Their daughter comes back, and well....it just was a horrible movie.
       I don't know why they make movies like these, where they abuse cats, hate every neighbor and go to great lengths to get away from Christmas.





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     Rapsity Street Kids Christmas: OMG WHAT THE F**K IS THIS!!!! I'm sorry but having great voice actors in this garbage is...well I have no words. You got Nancy Cartwright, Paige O'Hara (belle from beauty and the beast), Mark Hamill...so many great voice actors in this trash???
   It's supposed to be about a kid giving a gift to a spoiled brat that was from his deceased mom. But here's what I think of it...
    The graphics are atrocious, the movement of the characters, the voice not matching to the lip movements, and the grandma sounding as if she was being hexed.
  I'm sorry but I feel these voice actors were held hostage or something to make this movie happen.



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      The Christmas Tree: Thank God not many people have heard of this movie. It is by far an ABOMINATION of a cartoon flick that involves an orphanage, kids, and a tree that the woman from the orphanage wants to cut down. The far away you stay from this flick, the better.
        The voices of the children are annoying, the movement of the lips, the creepy stare in the eyes. How and WHY was this made??
     I've seen it once, and after that, I felt my eyes bleeding out. It was just HORRIBLE!


One more I wanna talk about. It's called....


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        Home Alone 3: And I thought Home alone 2 was bad, but this.....
There is no Kevin, Scarlett JoHansen is in this (I like her but this is not her best role) and it involves not two, but 4 criminal master minds that are after a computer chip that is in a toy car that belongs to a kid named Alex.
    Home alone with the chicken pox and his parents leave him ALL ALONE IN THE HOUSE!
I mean the first movie, they forgot Kevin, this time, these parents just don't care!
          FTLOG, really? This is what the great late John Hughes could come up with? I feel sorry for theses actors being in this abomination of a movie.


  Some Holiday movies are great, but sometimes you will get a complete let down. Miracle on 34th street, both versions were good. But you would like one over the other, they aren't horrible, train wrecks and it's an ok movie.

  These, I feel sorry for.

Till then, enjoy the great movies of the holidays with your families and stay away from these.

PS: Home alone four isn't good either.

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